Now the second reason why people are not emotionally available is because of a very common syndrome in our society, which I call the empty-self-syndrome. Now in simple terms this means someone who does not like themselves. People who do not like themselves cannot be intimate with other people. People who don’t like themselves spend their time eating themselves up, they are preoccupied with their deficiencies, with negativity, with their insecurities, with their inadequacies. And, literally, it consumes their energy. The more psychological way to understand this is, as I named it before, the empty self. Now the people who suffer from this are people, generally, that do come from homes where they did not get sufficient love, attention, emotional nourishment. Some of the symptoms of someone with an empty self… and please ask yourself if this might describe you or someone you’re dating. If it does you’ll be virtually impossible to be able to form an intimate relationship with such a person. Such people always feel empty. They’re always fighting depression. They just never feel good. They are isolated. They tend not to have close friends and they actually often distrust people and are afraid of other people. They’re critical, they tend to be judgmental. And a clear indication of such a problem is that they always feel that their needs are never getting met by other people. They have a sense of entitlement. They feel that people should take care of them and they’re angry when they don’t. Such people feel burdened by other people’s needs, which leads to resentment. They are self-critical and they’re often detached from their own feelings and their own needs and may have a very hard time expressing their own feelings and needs. And when they do, they tend to feel guilty and ashamed for having those needs. In some they have just a deep sense of feeling bad about who they are and simply don’t like who they are and don’t like themselves. Again, this is a very, unfortunately, common syndrome in our society and it is a fundamental reason why people are not emotionally healthy and why someone is not emotionally available.

This will conclude my presentation. Thank you for listening and I hope that what I’ve been able to share with you will help you in your quest to find a life partner and the person that you can be happily married to for the rest of your life.

Thank you.